[dc]S[/dc]now struck Lansing over the weekend. I would say a shit-ton, but I don’t know the exact volume one shit-ton equals (at least six inches?), so my guess might be a bit off. But then everything¹ related to me is a bit off.

The storm loosed enough snowy venom to force Lansing to shut down Sunday and Monday. Seriously, with a Mayoral Snow Emergency and all. It was a snow day for most of the city (give or take). This meant I got an extra day off, as did Stephanie. And Stephanie’s idea about how to spend our snow day? Sorting through boxes of our old crap. (For more going-through-old-crap LOLz, check out my Old Treasure post)

The highlight of my shifting and sorting through dusty boxes was finding a folder of my middle school and high school art class projects. Oh, the memories. Oh, the why-the-hell-did-I-keep-this and the what-the-hell-was-I-thinking.

Mike and Ike drawing

My 100% correct rendering of a Mike and Ike box.

I wasn’t in any special kind of art class (which is obvious if you pay attention to the photos), I don’t think my hometown even had such a thing (aside from the coveted ‘independent study). I always enjoyed art class, but other students (unfortunately) treated it as a blow off class. Fellow students drew Insane Clown Posse iconography so often, our teachers had to make a rule prohibiting ‘creepy clown faces.’

Looking over my old projects, it was easy to tell when inspiration struck, and when it did not. Most of the projects in the latter category is best summed up as, ‘what was in my backpack at the moment.’

“Here’s a color pencil drawing of a box of Mike and Ikes,” I said to Stephanie.

“Are you serious?”

“Yep. Oh, and here’s my drawing of the cover of Metallica’s seminal thrash metal album, Master of Puppets.”

master of puppets

A perfect copy of the Master of Puppets album cover.

Stephanie looked upon the off-model field of tombstones surrounded by the poorly stenciled title. “I think it’s obvious we had very different childhoods.”

“Yep. Here are the covers to Ride the Lightning and Kill ‘Em All.”

“Did you just draw Metallica albums?” Stephanie asked.

I held up an oil pastel drawing of a prism reflecting a rainbow. “Nah, looks like I got away with some Pink Floyd stuff too,” I said. I pulled out a few more sheets. “And dragons. Lots of dragons.”

Stephanie glanced at my gallery of dragons. “You had a thing for anorexic dragons.”

“Dragons and Metallica. That pretty much sums up middle school and high school for me,” I said. Stephanie sighed and adjusted her wedding band. I held up a portrait of a ‘gray’ alien smoking a cigarette. “Inspired by an X-Files episode.² Note the cigarette filter ring drawn too far out.”

“How did that happen?”

“The filter was an afterthought. I added it later because everyone thought the alien was smoking a joint,” I said. “Ah, want a Star Wars collage for the wall?”

“No.”

Then, I found the crown jewel of my collection: a bizarre oil pastel showing a triforce inspired shape floating in space, with each triangle connected by floating ribbons. “You see, I wrote my name on the top and the bottom of the page, so no one would know which end was up,” I said, tapping my right temple.

Stephanie: “…Wow.”

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¹ And everyone.
² Jose Chung’s From Outer Space.