[dc]M[/dc]y buddy Erik got hitched last month, and I was his best man (See: I Think My Mother is Trying to Tell Me Something).
Ah, editing. Photo by me.
Since Erik’s wedding was my first outing as a ‘hand of the groom,’ I was nervous. Not only did I have the Frodoian task of guarding the rings, I had the Cosbyian task of delivering an entertaining, yet PG rated speech at the reception.
This didn’t mean I couldn’t be funny. Erik expected nothing less. I jotted down ideas, but the idea I ended up using came to me, as my best ideas usually do, in the shower a few days before the wedding: I would use Prince lyrics. I would stitch together random phrases from different songs to make something resembling a heartfelt toast.¹
Then, on the eve of the rehearsal dinner, another idea struck me, thanks to my muse, Stephanie. She was handling DJ duties on my iPod while I drove to (gasp) Ann Arbor. As Rick Astley’s Never Gonna Give You Up thundered out of my car’s speakers, I became inspired: put a Rickroll in my best man speech.
As the photo above shows, I wrote the changes in by hand (and made several other time-saving edits).
The full text of the speech is below (behind the cut). To play along at home, I didn’t sing the lyrics, I spoke them aloud as if I were reading a regular, serious speech.
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comic spoof, 
and 